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Do NOT Mail Subscription Requests To Julian !
They Are Deleted Unseen By Julian's Spam Filter.
Do It Yourself !!
Do Your Own Address Additions, Deletions, &
Changes:
Mail Majordomo Your Subscription
Change Request !
Try Majordomo it's quick &
easy !
Read the Introduction first if you
want; Or jump straight in & Try It. You may
need a few goes before you succeed, or you may prefer to read
the Introduction first.
Too Lazy To Try Majordomo A Few
Times ?
Do No Not Waste Your Time Asking Julian To Waste His Time Too
!
Some are so lazy they won't even try Majordomo a few times & engage their
brain. Instead they mail Julian wanting to waste his time. A
waste of theirs ! Their mail gets deleted automatically,
unanswered, by his spam filter, he never even sees their
request, & their subscription remains unchanged.
Still Clueless After Trying Majordomo A Few Times ?
Try Majordomo several times And
engage your brain - hard, think logically even if
mostly you prefer to think intuitively  Analyse Majordomo results with a friend. Think, Try
again !
If You Finally Consider Yourself Incompetent
Buy some friend (Not Julian) or colleague a beer or cake to
offer advice or hold your hand while you or they use Majordomo for you. Spread the load ! Ask
someone else for advice ! Consider buying any "Internet For
Dummies" book that has a section covering use of mail lists.
Consider signing up for Internet night classes.
The Red Cross Final Option For Terminal Incompetents
For any who refuse or are incapable of getting advice from
others on how to "Do It Yourself" - Julian won't waste his
time for free for such people, they must pay with their time
& money, as a deterrent to discourage more people from
being also tempted to waste Julian's time !
- Go to a German bank:
- Pick up a preprinted transfer form for the "Rotes
Kreuz" (Red Cross, Red Crescent) as recipient.
- Fill in Betrag/Amount as 10 (Ten) Euros,
- Fill in Verwendungs- Zweck as: Your human name &
email address - spell it Very clearly, make sure its the
address to be added to or deleted from list, not some other
older or newer address !
- Include a blank stamped envelope, to post your form to
bank after processing.
- Include both & post in a stamped addressed envelope
to Julian, his address is in phone book. Instead of wasting
time searching for it Use
Majordomo instead !... OR
- Beg for permission to hand to Julian or any Beer garden organiser
member at any announced event they happen to attend.
Wait for them to give to Julian when we happen to meet.
Don't try to obligate Julian or others to attend/ not be
late/ not leave early, just because you want a time wasting
manual un subscription though !
- Wait a long time till Julian finally gets round to
wasting his time, un-subscribing you manually !
Comply precisely with the above. Any deviation will result in
Julian Not wasting his time un-subscribing someone by hand.
- Do not claim to have paid direct. Julian won't credit
such a claim, you'll just have to pay again.
- Do not pay 10 Euro to Julian's account. He will NOT
unsubscribe for that (& will not give bank details),
& will not repay, & will not do anything for it
either. Julian doesn't want anyone thinking he wants money
for un-subscribing, He doesn't ! He just doesn't want
people wasting his time any more !
- Do not give Julian 10 Euros cash, he will not accept
that either ! Fill out & bring your own bank form that
you, not julian, provides !
- Julian requires a signed original unused form for 10 EU
payable to Red Cross, physically in his hand, before he
will consider wasting his time un-subscribing people by
hand, which is completely un-necessary ! Use Majordomo, Don't wast Julian's time,
your time, & your money !
Do NOT Mail Julian About Subscriptions !
- Many people's `Just Want' requests were flooding Julian
!
- Each individual subscription change might previously have
not taken Julian long, but there are hundreds of people on
numerous mail lists who used to periodically mail Julian
subscription changes.
- All lists now have numerous subscribers who have
successfully used Majordomo. Get one
of them, or someone else who can think logically, to help
share the load. Get them to teach you Majordomo . Julian _runs_ Majordomo & numerous other services,
which is enough work in itself, & leaves no time to
educate & hand hold all individual subscribers (hence he
wrote the Majordomo web page.
- In addition to doing subscription changes, the previous
presence of a human rather than a computer program also
attracted extra time consuming mail on related subjects, now
also avoided by use of Majordomo.
- Julian has too many friends on the lists to even be able
to help personal friends unfortunately, let alone
others.
- Julian has given too much time for too many years running
lists etc manually.
- There are now more ever more lists, & people.
- Julian invested more time installing the robots. It would
be the height of folly to now not use them, & let the
clueless & lazy continue to burden & deprive Julian
of time, instead of making them finally take personal
responsibility to maintain their own list subscriptions.
- It's unfair to attempt to deprive Julian of his time,
just because some are too lazy or clueless to try to use the
robots.
- It's unfair to everyone else too, to deprive Julian of
time better spent developing extra functionality later useful
to all.
- Julian is a freelance, there is no distinction between
`working hours' & `leisure time', there's just `screen
time', & he spends too much time in front of the computer
as it is, & has no screen time to waste.
No More Free Help !
- Julian will Not waste time giving any help for any
subscription task the robot programs can
also do, regardless if your request is via personal mail,
list mail, phone, fax, or in person). If you'r too lazy or
clueless to use the robots, that's your
problem, not his, he is Not paid to support all the people on
all the lists, in particular not the large number of lazy
&/or clueless on certain lists. Some personal solutions
are suggested above.
- Majordomo is pretty trivial to
use, after you've tried it a few times, & given responses
a bit of thought.
- Do It Yourself ! Please Use The
Robots, as it says on every mail footer !
What Julian Still Does
- Organise Events for clubs using the lists
- Run the servers (the net computers)
- Run the Majordomo subscription
robot.
- Run the Mail Lists
- Enhance (time permitting) extra infra structure to
benefit all subscribers. EG more web interfaces.
Truly Exceptional Circumstances
In Truly Exceptional Circumstances, exception may be made, but
Not for all the merely lazy or clueless who want to waste
Julian's time. To discourage the lazy & clueless from
presenting themselves as exceptional, the following mandatory
pre-conditions apply, in this order only, before any action
will be taken:
- Wait to happen to meet Julian at some social event.
- Offer to buy him a beer if he really believes your case
is truly exceptional.
- Buy beer
- Wait again till he remembers to act on the request.
That may take months ! Go do it yourself for free Now. :-)
The above completely excludes anyone asking Julian to do
manual subscribes & un-subscribes now, with vague offers to
buy him a beer later sometime. The double deterrent of making
you wait, & consuming your money is intended as deliberate
encouragement to Try Majordomo! Now !
& is Not a scheme to get Julian free beer: Julian does not
want to consume _your_ free beer. Julian does not want you to
consume _his_ free time.
No one gets any help or response, unless they at least
provide substantial proof of repeated sequences of attempts at
self help, including proven self analysis of Majordomo responses (by which stage people
don't need to ask for help, - they have almost always analysed
sufficiently, & succeeded themselves !).
Use your intelligence - Go use Majordomo Thanks !
Only Contact List Owners If :
The Majordomo documentation, defines
the correct addresses for list owners.
Only Contact Majordomo Owner If :
- There is some problem the list owner cannot solve.
- There is some technical (not philosophical or user)
problem.
- There is a configuration or run time error with
majordomo.
- You are a skilled Unix admin / BSD person, & are
reccomending syntax correction for an erroneous majordomo
config.
The Majordomo documentation, defines
the correct addresses for majordomo owners.
Only Contact Julian If:
- You realise subscription requests are deleted
automatically as spam.
- You want to Phone order Purchase
Of Computer Consultancy. (Best
phone, email may get lost in over a hundred spams Julian gets
every day). To discuss a short or long, local or remote
contract, or to arrange pre payment for a few short hours,
on/off site, via phone or net-remote or on site, please Phone
Julian.
- You're contacting for social reasons, nothing to do with
your mail list subscription or ski booking etc ? OK
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